Day 5 of 13

This week has been kind of eh. The kids haven’t been listening well, so that is frustrating. I haven’t been very patient. They’ve been waking me up every night, several times a night, with bad dreams and cuddle requests and by slapping me in the face in their sleep. Also, it seems Julian has inherited my ability to speak super clearly in his sleep without remembering a thing in the morning. “Yes, I would like you to please pass the tomatoes. Thank you.” Zzzzzzz. Also, why is it still so cold. All that, and my husband is in LA. But there is this guy:


We haven’t done a whole lot this week. We went to IKEA one day and didn’t kill each other, and other than that just school and speech and lots and lots of playing. This morning I woke up like this:

The photos are so grainy and not great, but they are my life right now. Children in my bed. Messy hair and sleepy eyes. Silly, loving boys.

I went to the gym this morning, like almost every day this week, and it’s been the one thing that’s kept me sane. Afterwards we had a good lunch; Arthur napped, Julian rested, and I read. And then Julian documented our life with photos. He doesn’t do it often, but when he asks I always say yes, because I love going through my photos and finding dozens of things that are important to my son. Toys, places in our messy apartment, us, our life. I love it.


Also, he took this:


The rest of the day we played lego and Star Wars, because it’s actually fun. And the boys played and played on their own. I read my book and relaxed. It was a day where it all clicked. Oh, and I made tacos, and the boys wouldn’t stop eating, and that always makes me happy.


When I said goodnight, this is how I left them:


And that was the last I heard. No incessant requests for another hug, cream, using the bathroom, another hug, another hug. They just put themselves to bed.

And even though almost every moment of this week was hard, and I’ve been feeling under the weather, impatient, inadequate, and grumpy, today was a sweet reminder that I have good kids. That these are sweet, lovable, loving creatures. That our life isn’t anything fancy, but it’s all these in-between moments that make it ours.

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