Motherhood is awesome

Tonight was so awesome I just want to write it down so I can reminisce when I’m 80. Just kidding. Tonight sucked.

There was constant screaming starting at 5pm. Until bedtime. Constant. Sometimes only one child screamed, but usually both. Perhaps they are working on a duet. Keep it to yourselves, kids. You’re not the next boy band, and with that hollering you’re not going to win any Grammys. 

My favorite is when Arthur is screaming, and then Julian starts screaming “HUSH!!!!” at him, which makes Arthur scream more, which makes Julian scream more. At this point I want to walk out and let them fend for themselves.

Aside from showing off their incredible lung capacities, there was lots of pushing, taking toys away, and generally being obnoxious. There. I said it. My children can be so obnoxious.

And because apparently our doors aren’t wide enough, Arthur decided to run into the door frame face first. Yay. Huge egg on head.

One highlight: “Mama, I think I will try this broccoli.” And so he did. It was kind of a huge moment in our lives. 

Anyway, back to complaining. My kitchen looks like a bomb exploded. I have a huge piano in a box in the middle of my living room. A husband who is out for drinks. Clutter everywhere. Laundry to be put away. A child who is currently throwing all of his pacifiers out of his crib and is screaming at the top of his lungs because OMG WHY ARE THERE NO PACIFIERS IN MY CRIB.

But worst of all: I don’t have any chocolate or beer. 

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